We Know How Hard This Is

Losing your mom is one of the most devastating experiences life can bring. Whether she was your confidante, your protector, your biggest cheerleader, or all of these and more, the world feels emptier without her. Writing her eulogy during this heartbreaking time may feel impossible, and that's completely understandable.

You might be worried about finding the right words, about breaking down in front of everyone, or about capturing the depth of who she was. These fears are natural. Take a deep breath. You don't have to be perfect. You just need to speak from your heart.

Understanding the Purpose

A eulogy for your mother is your chance to celebrate the woman who gave you life and shaped who you are. It's a space to share what made her special, to let others see her through your eyes, and to keep her memory alive in the hearts of everyone who loved her. This isn't about a perfect speech. It's about love, remembrance, and saying goodbye.

Getting Started

Give Yourself Grace

First, know this: however you're feeling right now is okay. Grief has no timeline, and there's no "right way" to do this. Some days writing might feel impossible. That's normal. Take breaks when you need them.

Reflect on Her Life

When you're ready, think about the moments that defined your relationship:

• The sound of her voice and the comfort of her embrace
• The advice she gave you that still guides you
• The little things she did that made you feel loved
• The values she lived by and taught you
• The quirks and habits that were uniquely hers

Gather Your Thoughts

These questions might help unlock memories:

• What would you want her to know if you could tell her one more time?
• What story about her always makes you smile, even now?
• How did she show her love in her own special way?
• What parts of her do you see in yourself?

Structure Your Eulogy

There's no perfect formula, but having a gentle structure can help when words feel hard to find:

1. Opening – Thank everyone for being there. Acknowledge the pain you're all feeling together.
2. Introduction – Share who she was to you and what defined her character.
3. Personal Stories – Tell 2 or 3 stories that capture her spirit. These moments matter most.
4. Her Heart – Describe what she valued, how she loved, what brought her joy.
5. Impact & Legacy – How she shaped you and others. What she leaves behind.
6. Closing – Your final words to her. It's okay if tears come.

Writing Tips

Be Authentic

Speak the way you naturally speak. Use your own words, not fancy language that doesn't sound like you. Your mom knew your voice. Use it to remember her.

Let yourself feel. If emotion wells up while writing or speaking, that's beautiful. It shows love. Everyone there understands because they're grieving too.

If your mom had a sense of humor, share that side of her. Laughter through tears can be healing.

Keep It Personal

The most meaningful eulogies are filled with specific details. Not "she was loving," but "she always waited up until I got home, no matter how late." Not "she was strong," but "she worked two jobs and never once complained."

Use her actual words when you can. Her favorite sayings, her advice, the pet names she called you. These details bring her back into the room, just for a moment.

Remember Your Audience

Aim for 5 to 10 minutes. That might feel short, but it's enough to say what matters. Everyone there is grieving too, and briefer can be more powerful.

This eulogy is for everyone who loved her, but it's also for you. It's part of your goodbye.

Preparing to Deliver

Practice reading it aloud, even though it will hurt. This helps you know where the hardest parts are.

Print it in large font. Bring two copies in case tears blur the words.

Ask someone you trust to be ready to step in if you can't continue. There's no shame in that. The attempt alone shows your love.

During the eulogy, take your time. Pause when you need to. Look up and see the faces of people who loved her too. You're not alone in this.

Everyone there is supporting you. They understand. No one expects perfection. They just want to remember her with you.

What to Include

Include what feels right:

• Specific memories that make her real again, even briefly
• Her quirks, her laugh, the things that made her uniquely her
• How she made you feel loved and cherished
• Her own words and wisdom
• Humor, if it fits who she was

You might want to avoid:

• Trying to cover her entire life story (choose meaningful moments instead)
• Inside references that will confuse most people
• Family conflicts or pain that overshadows the good
• Apologies or regrets (save those for private moments)
• Anything that doesn't feel true to who she really was

You Can Do This

We know this is one of the hardest things you'll ever do. The pain of losing your mom doesn't go away, but finding words to remember her can be part of your healing.

Our templates below provide gentle structure and prompts to help you when you're struggling to find words. They're starting points filled with love and understanding. You'll add your stories, your memories, your voice.

Take your time. Be kind to yourself. Your mom would be proud of you for trying.