How to Structure a Eulogy
Writing a eulogy for someone you love is one of the most meaningful and challenging things you may ever do. It is natural to feel overwhelmed, unsure where to begin, or worried about finding the right words to honor their memory.
Please know that there is no perfect eulogy. What matters most is that your words come from the heart. The people gathered will not remember every phrase, but they will remember the love and authenticity with which you speak.
We have created this gentle guide to help you structure your thoughts. Think of it as a supportive framework, not rigid rules, but a compassionate roadmap to help you navigate this emotional journey. You can follow it closely or adapt it to fit your own unique tribute.
Take your time. Be kind to yourself. And remember that your willingness to honor your loved one with your words is already a beautiful gift.
Opening
Start with a gentle and heartfelt welcome. Create a feeling of warmth and support as everyone gathers to remember someone who meant so much.
- How would you welcome everyone to this gathering?
- What feeling do you want to create in the room?
- How can you acknowledge the shared loss while offering comfort?
Introduction
Share who they were in a simple, loving way. Offer a brief sense of their background and the kind of person they were, helping everyone settle into the memory of them.
- How would you describe them to someone who never met them?
- What were the most important things about their life?
- What roles did they play in the lives of others?
Personality
Talk about the qualities that made them who they were. The little things, the big things, and the irreplaceable parts of their personality that people will always remember.
- What would people say was most special about them?
- What made them laugh? What made them come alive?
- What quirks or habits will you always remember?
Personal Story
Tell a story that helps bring them to life again for a moment. Choose something that shows their heart, their humour, or a moment that reveals their true character.
- What is a memory that perfectly captures who they were?
- Is there a moment that always makes you smile when you think of them?
- What story would they have loved to hear you tell about them?
Values
Reflect on what mattered most to them. The values they lived by, the kindness they shared, and the ways they made a difference to others and to the world around them.
- What did they care most deeply about?
- How did they make the world a better place?
- What lessons or wisdom did they share with others?
Closing
End with a final, loving message. Offer a gentle farewell that honours their life and allows your last words to be a meaningful and heartfelt tribute.
- What would you want to say to them if they could hear you now?
- How will their memory continue to live on?
- What final words capture your gratitude for having known them?